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Keith's Speech
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Good Morning. I first would like to thank God for allowing me to live long enough to be able to address everyone here today. It is a humbling experience and I'm honored to have this opportunity to speak about heart disease and the effect racism has on African American males as well as the entire African American community. I also am honored to be able to share my experiences as an African American living with heart disease. Secondly, I want to thank Mayor Menino, Dr. John Rich, from the Boston Public Health Commission, and the American Heart Association for inviting me to speak with you today. I'd like to thank my mother, who gave me life and taught me that I am somebody. I want to thank my doctors and to thank God personally for saving me and for giving my doctors the knowledge and the talent to be able to save my life, especially Dr. Taylor. Not only is he my personal doctor, he's also my childhood friend and brother. I want to thank Dr. Dobroski who came down to see me in the emergency room because Dr. Taylor said to him "Don't let my brother die". It's funny, I don't know if he would have given me the kind of care he did, if Dr Taylor hadn't asked him to. All I know is that I had never had that kind of care from a white doctor before. I didn't expect it and I didn't really know how to deal with it. I'd like to thank Jay Fedigan, the producer and director of The Angry Heart, and his wife Carolyn, Sue Safton, Steve Dalhgren, Ken Lacouture and the rest of the team who volunteered their time to make this film possible, and all of the sponsors especially my friend Tom Peckham at AVFX, and the Boston Film Video Foundation. My story is the subject of the documentary, The Angry Heart, which is about the effects of racism on heart disease in African Americans. In order to address this audience, I'd like to tell you a little background story about how The Angry Heart came to be. Who would have thought when Jay and I talked on that van ride so many years ago? I worked for this guy, Mr. Jay Fedigan and I was doing a project with him in New York City for a big charity event at the Waldorf . We had worked together on several other projects but this time we ended up riding back from New York to Boston together in a van full of gear. We got to talking about a lot of things, but one of the things we started talking about was racism. It was a pretty lengthy discussion and we went back and forth a bit, you know. I told Jay some things he had never considered, because he happens to be white and he told me some things that I had never considered because I'm black. As I said, we were working at the Waldorf Astoria in New York City and one of the things free lancers like is a free meal. So, before the long ride back to Boston we decided to have lunch in one of the fancy restaurants in the hotel. We walked in separately, a few paces apart and I got ignored. It seemed like the people there didn't want to deal with me. I could have been a bum off the street, although I wasn't dressed that way, that's how they dealt with me until Jay walked in. When Jay saw how I was being treated he got angry and one of the things that changed the relationship between us, from employee and employer to more of a friendship, was seeing how angry he was. It was obvious to everyone around how angry he was. I had never seen anyone act like that before, it was totally professional, not loud or boisterous, facial attitude. By the visual reaction he had spoken volumes to me. I always thought of Jay as a gentle Ben kind of guy and then I got to see the bear. And it made me feel good. Probably the first time I felt that comfortable with any white male in my life. Being black in America and dealing with white males in America has not been comfortable for me. Every experience I have had with white males has been very stressful. One of the things that began to change my feeling about white people was my relationship with Jay Fedigan. It gave me hope, I figured there might be a few more out there. After lunch at the Waldorf, we were in the van and Jay was driving. The thing that came out of the drive was I found a white man who didn't know how bad racism still is and he didn't feed into it, and that gave me a hope, a boost. It made me think that despite our life experiences, our differences, we could be friends. Here's a white man who didn't see me for anything but just another person. He dealt with me on the basis of my ability and not what I look like. He thought I'd be good for the job, that my talent was worth having, not because I fit a quota. It's really how it started, from that friendship and from that conversation we had, we developed a relationship that when I got sick he was inspired to want to do something. It started a dialog, even before my heart attack. But it wasn't until I got sick that Jay wanted to say something, and open it up to more people. When Jay decided he wanted to do The Angry Heart, what inspired me to do it, was his total frustration with the whole thing (my heart attack to the point that I almost died) and his wanting to do something about it, to do this documentary. I couldn't let him go off by himself, we had to do it together. I thought at first it was just a way for him to get out his frustration, I never thought he'd really get so into it and do this whole project. I never would have gotten up in front of people, never would be doing this. I became a camera man because I like to be behind the camera, not in front of it. But thanks to the grace of god here I am. They say that everything happens for a reason and I am a great believer of that expression. Living with heart disease and surviving three heart attacks and quadruple by-pass surgery, have been some of the most difficult and painful experiences of my life. But, not only has it changed my life, and the way I live it has set me on a path towards making a difference. Helping people see that we are but one race, the human race, and that we all need each other. That equality is the God given right of all men and women. That no one should have to wonder when he goes into a hospital in the city of Boston or anywhere what quality of care he or she will receive. That the way a law enforcement officer treats you has nothing to do with driving while black and that the education you receive offers you the same opportunities the wealthy communities afford their children no matter what community you live in. Yes, racism has affected my life... discrimination is an obstacle that diminishes us all. What good has come from all of this you might ask? Well, I have witnessed a change. A change in myself and a change in my friends. Opening up an honest dialogue on racism is not easy but it is our only hope for our future and the future of our children. I hope that this documentary, The Angry Heart, will begin that dialogue and will make a change in all that see it. To God be the Glory, Thank you. |
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copyright © 2002 Jay Fedigan |